The top 5 reasons being a dog parent is everything...

I always knew I was going to love Once Upon A Time in Hollywood when I walked into that theatre in 2019, about six months before the world went to hell. What I didn’t expect was being moved so much by a male friendship - especially that scene where Cliff and Rick watch an old episode of F.B.I together, the moment infused with such warmth and familiarity you know it's a ritual that they have indulged in for years together (fuck QT is a great writer/ director). It reminded me of my best friends in high school, how we would get together and watch movies. Jade and I hired our way through every horror VHS at Video Ezy, Cassandra and I worked our way through sci-fi, and the twins and I made our way through the great directors of our time, being enraptured by so much of what we saw on screen. But even more than that, I adored Cliff Booth’s relationship with his dog, Brandy, a red pit bull who has no time for dirty hippies, yet has a heart of gold reserved for everybody else. 

See, in edition to being a stunt-man, loyal BFF to Rick Dalton, and a total badass with a (slightly more than) questionable past, Cliff Booth is a loving dog parent, and it’s fucking awesome (and as someone who once fed her dog on acid, all I can say to Cliff Booth in this scene is… 

… mood).

 When I read the book adaptation of Once Upon A Time however (also penned by QT), I got to know Brandy’s backstory, and learn of Cliff’s movie loving Sunday afternoons, when he selected a film to see alone at his one of his local theatres. Both of these character details had me pointing to my book and going “OMG me!”

Granted, Toto’s start in life wasn’t as brutal as Brandy’s, but it was still pretty rough. And perhaps on a more personal note, I knew what it was like to secretly lean too heavily on your friends, because life hadn’t quite gone to plan and they were all you had. And as for my movie Sunday’s, these are mostly enjoyed watching bluray’s or old DVD’s on my tv while in bed, Toto snoozing beside me (in case you hadn’t gathered from all the talk of heartbreak, I’m still single). I enjoy movies from the comfort of my room because unfortunately, cinemas in Sydney don’t play enough seminal, obscure films anymore. Regardless - many parts of Cliff’s story struck a note in my heart. 

When I rescued Toto back in 2016 she was a little three month old malnourished puppy, and she stared up at me as I entered the pen where all puppies were kept to meet their potential new parents. When my eyes met hers, she started wagging her tail in spite of the awful conditions she had just come from. It was absolutely love at first sight, and as I stared into those big soulful eyes I knew I had found a tiny soulmate, and she has been my best friend and little furbaby ever since (I’m not sure I can ever have children, so she is everything). She has pulled me through the hardest moments of my life with her humour and unconditional love.

Toto - named after the band.

Here are 5 reasons being a dog parent is awesome (and 5 things only dog parents will understand).

 1) You never have to explain the plot of Twin Peaks to her. Or the plot of anything, at all, ever (though she does spend the first five minutes of every episode looking for the robin in the opening credits - who cares about the murder of Laura Palmer? We all know it was the bird that did it. ALL BIRDS ARE ENEMY). 

“I scareds away the robin!”

2) You will be trying to have an intimate moment, only to suddenly notice her silently staring at you. Or him. 

But mostly you.

“Hi! Whatchya doooooing...”

3) You have a vacuum cleaner, ready to clean up any food crumbs that may find their way to the floor

"I is doggo Dyson for crumbs!"

4) You have a spooning buddy when extra lonely...

5) You have someone to protect you from T.V villains. And T.V animals. And creatures of flight. And delivery people. And the post man. And CYCLISTS. And owls. And hippies. And moon. And that plastic bag that one time. And other doggo's. And Frank Zappa. And everything… ever. Except that one time she tried to play fetch with the T.V man.

PROTECC - From Zappa

PROTECC - From the tv doggo’s (also maybe the nice man will play fetch with me? Where he go?)

PROTECC - From that thing over there

Lastly, you have a little girl who stares at you with unconditional love even on your lowest day, like so…

Thank you my little one, for bringing out the mother in me, for being Brandy to my Cliff Booth, and for always being better than people. I love you.

🐾🖤